I recently attended a class given by an arborist where he explained how trees need support ; everything from the sun above to the water below.

If you plant a tree and restrict its roots with cement or a metal ring, it can only grow so big and for so long. This is why trees in parking lots and housing communities only live to be 20 or 30 years old.

An exception to this rule is the great Redwood trees.

So why do these towering giants require fewer roots and less space than one might anticipate? Because they rely on the support of each other. Their proximity fosters their growth, which allows them to prosper. With life spans over 1000 years, they are the experts of growth within the tree family.

Redwood trees thrive because of the support of other Redwood trees.

As for our own lives, we can look to these trees as guidance. We’re not on an island by ourselves. We depend on others, and others depend on us. When we are experiencing challenges, and trying to find new meaning and purpose, it is critical that we look to sources of support.

If we are suffering from difficulties, the easy choice might be to crawl into our inner world and forget about our own support systems. We can even push them away; going into a “cave” of solitude.

I believe we isolate when we need help the most, because we forget one truth: we all go through difficulties in life! We see the perfect life that others show us (especially behind a computer screen)…so we seclude ourselves and try to become “OK” again. But the reality is that we really do have similar feelings and experiences.

Sometimes, the initial “support” we need may come in the form of a book, nature, meditation, prayer, pets, or therapy. Places of rest and quiet. A place to find the energy to get back into the social world again.

From there, we become ready to spend time with people where we can be our authentic selves. It is so important to recognize that support will feed our energy and help us heal, stabilize, regroup, and ultimately find new meaning and purpose in our difficult experience.

Sometimes our support does not comes from the people who are closest to us geographically or in our day-to-day lives. Just because someone is a family member, a partner, a neighbor, or someone you work with, they may not be in our innermost circle of support. And that is okay.

There are also different kinds of layers of “support.” For example, the people we connect with on social media. I do not mean the online relationships we share with people who also know us in person, but rather, those who are only connecting behind a computer.

Social media can feel like the number one support for many people based on the sheer amount of time spent online. However, people are showing us what they want us to see, not always who they authentically are.

We can either be like the trees that are restricted due to the cement or metal encircling us, limiting our growth, or we can fortify ourselves by utilizing the supportive roots of others.

So, where do you find your support when you feel alone or isolated?

Family. Friends. Mentors. Coaches. Neighbors. Online Communities. Support Groups. Professional Networks. Therapists. Counselors. Volunteer Organizations. Educational Institutions. Fitness Classes. Clubs. Spiritual Communities. God. Books. Podcasts. Local Meetups. Workplace. Music. Nature.